Author Q&A with Anne Falkowski

Anne Falkowski’s work is upcoming or has been published in Hippocampus, Pithead Chapel, The Rumpus, Solstice Review, Hunger Magazine, The Coachella Review, Change Seven, and others. She has been nominated multiple times for Best of the Net. In 2023, her writing was placed in Solstice Fiction Literary Prize, Frank Demott Literary Prize., and Writers Digest Personal Essay Contest. In 2024, she placed first in the Oxford Flash Fiction Prize. Website AnneFalkowski.net.

Tell us about yourself. 

I started writing later in life, late forties. It took me that long to trust I could say the things I wanted to say, even if it challenged others and wasn’t always beautiful. My partner and kids are all practicing artists. I realized if I didn’t act upon my life-long desire to write, my own fear of rejection and failure could be internalized by my children. 

How to Be Made by Men, 1981 immerses the reader into the feelings of a young girl. How did you transport yourself back to that time to paint such a vivid picture of your experience?

I don’t believe we experience time as linear, especially when telling our stories. In a workshop with Lidia Yuknavitch, she taught portals as a way to drop in to a memory or experience. The Frank Zappa song, Dina Mo Hum, was one of those portals. I remembered exactly how I felt when those lyrics were playing through the van’s speakers. So was the vivid image of the van. Once I had those two portals, I let go into the scene, even though I wasn’t sure what I had to say.

Do you think young women still experience the need to be made by men? Why or why not? 

Today there is so much pressure to be curated or performative on social media, which adds a whole other dimension we didn’t have in the 80’s. The act of Roe V. Wade being overturned activates the power men have over women’s bodies. Also as a writer I’m aware of the blowback of personal narrative. Every time I publish creative nonfiction I run the risk of being deemed too real, too personal or intimate which I don’t believe is the same for men or as dangerous. Being vulnerable and getting harassed on social media is very real.

How do we break free from that conditioning?

We make truthful art. 

There are various forms of nonfiction writing styles. What made you decide on a “how to” model for this story? Did you consider other writing styles when developing this piece?

An undone version had been sitting in my slush file for five years. I knew something about it wasn’t right. In early 2024, a prompt in one of my writing groups was to turn a piece of flash you are struggling with into a set of instructions. A light went off. If I viewed my younger self as following an unspoken set of instructions which she didn’t create, or even have the capacity to fully understand, this story would be closer to the truth. Following a set of instructions feels necessary for her survival but maybe more important, it brought in compassion. Self acceptance was missing in my earlier versions of the story. 

How do you make time for your writing life? 

This is a big question for me because I have ADHD and OCD. I was diagnosed with both only a few years ago. Besides taking meds, I set a timer and work in half hour sprints. I also have writing buddies. We write together on zoom, Having another person to body-double with or be accountable to is super helpful. Last but not least, I meditate before writing, allowing my nervous system to relax and understand that writing is not life or death, success or failure, or my entire identity. 

Where do you draw your inspiration for your fiction and non-fiction pieces?

No matter what I set out to write, I always seem to have the same themes show up-Writing into the space of bodies and lost girlhood. I suppose when I feel finished with this (if ever) I’ll move on. 

Tell us about your memoir, “Ordinary Body.” 

It’s been revised a zillion times. I’m pretty confident it’s done. At some point, I’ll seek agent representation. Basically, it’s about a younger me becoming a yoga teacher and yoga studio owner, hoping to have the perfect life and get the perfect body, which of course never happens. I learn how competitive and under the wraps of male gaze the western yoga industry is. In order to accept my body as is, I go back into my childhood and examine my relationship with my mother and other women in order to find healing and self-acceptance.  

What do you think of when you hear “the good life?” 

Maybe the good life is looking up at the stars and knowing that you have loved at least one being unconditionally, have been loved by at least one being unconditionally, and have experienced gratitude for at least one thing in the path of your life.  

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Anne’s flash essay “How to Be Made by Men, 1981” was a team favorite in this year’s HoneyBee Prize and appears in our summer 2024 issue.

Thank you, Anne, for taking extra time on this Q&A with us! We wish you the best with writing, and all of your endeavors.